So I haven't posted lately because I've been SO down in the dumps. We're talking daily sob fests. I don't remember it being this awful last time! I'm still only on L.upron! Why do I feel like I belong in a psych ward? I finally broke down and called my ivf coordinator to ask her what the deal was. She made me feel SO much better! She said that since I didn't take bcps this time, I don't have enough estrogen to balance out my emotions. She said it is totally normal to feel really down and that as soon as I start F.ollistim, it will be better. Well, at least I'm not losing it!
I also went this morning for my suppression check bloodwork and ultrasound. Everything looks quiet and good and I'm ready to start stimming. Yay! The nurse asked how I was feeling about this cycle and if it was easier having been through it before and knowing what to expect this time. I feel very hopefully about this time, but going through it before doesn't neccessarily make it better. It makes it worse in many ways. It's nice to know what to expect as far as the shots and monitoring go, but it's scary to know about how bad my body will feel at times, that I might get O.HSS again, how terrifying the emotions can get, etc. I guess I just can't focus on the scary parts. I know that I have done this before and I did get through it. I faced a worst-case scenario and I lived to tell the tale. This time can only be better, right? (PLEASE say right!!!)
I'm excited and hopefully and ready to get this party started!