Saturday, August 28, 2010

One Year Ago

One year ago yesterday, I had my first beta for our last IVF. It was 35 and I was devastated. I was sure that I was going to have a chemical pregnancy or a miscarriage and I told my IVF coordinator that if it was going to end, I just wanted it to happen sooner rather than later. Two days later my beta had doubled, a week later it was off the charts, and two weeks later we saw a heartbeat. I think I was more surprised than anyone that it actually worked! I can't believe that I'm sitting here, a year later, with my precious Lily sleeping in her crib in the yellow room.

Lily rolled over for the first time this week and we were so excited! It's amazing how much she grows and changes everyday. Here's a video of her latest antics at 3.5 months!

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

New England Trip

Mr. C, Lily, and I spent the last week in New England on a work trip/family vacation. We spent the first part of the trip in Newport, RI and then the rest of our time in Massachusetts. Lily was a wonderful flyer! We were worried about how she would do in the air, but she did beautifully!

The neatest thing happened on our USAir flight to RI. I asked the flight attendant if they still gave out wings for first time flyers. She said that they don't make them anymore but that she would get the signatures of the flight crew and captain for us to put in Lily's baby book. A few minutes later, she came back with the signatures and another flight attendant. She introduced the other lady, Sheila, and said that she had been a flight attendant on the plane that went down in the Hudson River last year. Sheila handed us a pair of wings and said she had them with her on the Hudson flight and she wanted Lily to have them. It was so special and neat! We were amazed!

Here are some pics from our time in New England.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Lily's Arrival Video

Mr. C put together this beautiful video capturing Lily's birth and our time in the hospital. I've seen it at least 50 times, but I still tear up every time!

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Birth Story

As I was updating my blog the other day, I realized that I never posted my birth story. Better late than never, I guess, so here it is!

My OB asked that I be at the hospital on Tuesday, May 11, around 7:30pm so that I could take c.ytotec overnight and hopefully get my cervix ready for induction the next day. Mr. C and I packed our bags and went to Saluda's for one last date as a couple. We left after a very delicious dinner and headed straight to the hospital.

As soon as we got there, the nurse took me to a delivery room and got me in a gown and all hooked up to the millions of monitors. It was so reassuring to constantly see the baby's heart rate and to know that they would immediately intervene if something went wrong. Honestly, it was the first time during my pregnancy that I was completely confident that the baby would make it. As much as I loved being pregnant, in the back of my mind, I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I guess that's part of the injustice of infertility. It was about 10:00 by the time I was all hooked up and ready to go. According to the monitor, I was having contractions on my own about every 3 minutes or so, but I couldn't feel them at all.

Once the blood pressure monitor got going, the nurse was concerned because my bp was way up. She decided to run some tests for preeclampsia but declared that everything was okay. Mr. C was there and we tried to close our eyes and get some sleep. Sleep was pretty much impossible, though, because we were so excited and because the blood pressure cuff was squeezing every few minutes, the nurse kept coming in to check on me, the a/c was rattling, and C was sleeping on a pull out sofa. All of that didn't faze us, though, because at this point we were so ready to meet our baby! I took 2 doses of c.ytotec during the night, hoping that my cervix was doing what it was supposed to do. I got up about 6:00am on Wednesday, May 12 and took a shower and got presentable for what I hoped would be Baby G's birthday.

My OB came in around 7:30 to check me and see what the meds had done overnight. As soon as he started the cervix check, he said, "Oh, no." I was like, "WHAT????" He said that I had made absolutely no progress. I was upset, but he wanted to start the p.itocin and give it a few hours to see if that would work. So the nurse started the p.itocin and upped the dosage every 30 minutes until the OB came back at around 11:15. I was still having contractions every 2-3 minutes, but I still couldn't feel anything. When he came back in, my OB had everything ready to break my water and get the show on the road. When he checked my cervix, however, he said he couldn't even get the little water-breaking instrument in! It was ridiculous that I had made absolutely no change whatsoever! He decided right then to do the c-section. At that point, I was totally fine with the decision. All along, I kept saying that however I needed to deliver to ensure a healthy baby was fine with me.

The nurse prepped me for surgery and the anesthesiologist came in to tell me about the spinal. Then my parents arrived from out of town and we had a few minutes to visit before the surgery. When everything was ready, Mr. C and I had about 30 minutes alone. I was just crying and feeling so overwhelmed. I couldn't believe that this 5 year journey was at an end and a new journey was about to begin. It was such an emotional time for both of us.

Then the nurse came in and wheeled me to the operating room. Mr. C kissed me and they took me in for prep while he waited outside. The operating room was such a happy place! Music was playing and there were about 7 people there already who were all so nice and excited for me. I sat on the table and the anesthesiologist gave me the spinal. I honestly didn't feel it one bit. By the time they laid me back on the table, I couldn't feel my legs at all. I was afraid that I would be freaked out by the feeling, but it didn't bother me. The nurse was pinching me in different places to gauge my feeling.

Finally my doctor came in and they let C come in and sit beside my head. He does not do well with blood, so I was a little (ok, a lot) afraid that he would pass out. When I smelled the burny cauterization smell, I got a little freaked out because I started to think about what was happening to my body behind the curtain, but C talked to me and everyone was joking and in a good mood, so I was distracted. The feeling I got during the surgery was just like I felt when the baby would move around a lot. It didn't feel like tugging or pressure, just a very active baby. Finally I heard a tiny little squeak and looked at C with my eyes wide. He actually looked over the curtain and saw her being born. I was so proud of him! The doctor held her up so that C could announce the gender, but the OB's arm was in front of the important parts, so C couldn't tell! Finally he said, "It's a girl!!!" and I just about fell off the table! I was SO sure it was going to be a boy and I was indescribably thrilled that it was a girl.

The doctor held her up over the curtain and I saw her for the first time. It was only for a second, but seeing my daughter for the first time was the most amazing moment of my life. They took her over to clean her up and C followed. Finally they brought her to me and I got to kiss her. My arms were still pinned down so I couldn't touch her, but I got to spend a few minutes kissing and staring at her. Then they whisked her away to the nursery to weigh, measure, and wash her. Mr. C went with Lily as the doctor sewed me up. It was SO hard to see my baby for just a short time and then have her taken away. At least I knew that C was with her and that I would see her again soon.

As he was completing my surgery, Dr. S was like, "'ve got a ton of endometriosis scarring and lesions in here." I was shocked since I've never been diagnosed with endo, nor had any symptoms. He removed all the gunk and told me that I'd be pregnant again in a matter of months. I couldn't believe it and still can't! If that's been our problem all along and our RE never did a lap, I'm going to be very angry. SO....we're going to see what happens and perhaps his prediction will come true!

So, finally the surgery was finished and I went to the recovery room. After what seemed like HOURS, Mr. C and Lily came in. We got to spend about an hour together as a family of three and get to know Lily a bit.

This story is getting WAY to0 long, so I'll sum it all up by simply saying that Lily makes every moment of the last 5 years worth it. She is truly a dream come true, a million prayers answered, and the joy of my life.

Sunday, August 1, 2010

My Beautiful Girl

I've been a TERRIBLE blogger...I'm so sorry! Here's an update, finally:

We are loving every day with Lily! She is a joy and so much fun. Lily is a laid back baby; she loves to smile and coo and she already sleeps through the night (from about 9:30pm-7:30am)! We love taking her places; the mall, the zoo, the grocery store, out to dinner, and on family visits out of town. She is a great traveler and loves to snooze in her car seat. Here are some recent pics:

In the hot SC sun, a girl needs stylish shades!

Feeding the giraffes at the zoo.

Visiting mommy's alma mater.

Lily's 4th of July outfit.

Last but not least, here's a video of Lily's latest antics.